I was looking to get some quiet studying in at Starbucks one afternoon, when much to my chagrin I spotted an ex-crush from college standing before me in line–ruining my zen mood completely. He may have waved at me as I walked through the door, but I was too stunned to respond so I simply took my place in line like a normal customer. In reality I was having a mild internal panic attack. Why is he here, the one time I go to Starbucks? How do I look? Oh, great, I look a hot mess. What do I like at Starbucks again?! I desperately looked to the menu, but my mind couldn’t focus on the words. By some miracle I collected my thoughts enough to recall my order by the time I reached the counter. The caffeine in my iced mocha only exacerbated this sudden bout of nervous energy. I knew what I needed at that moment: an invigorating run. Anywhere, any distance. I just needed my iPod and my Nikes.
Let’s suffice it to say, there was a point when I really liked this person. But he was quick to judge and never took the time to really get to know me. After he dumped me, I never heard from him again. Which is why I was taken off-guard at the coffee shop. I suppose I don’t take rejection well…but however insignificant the relationship, it does something to a person when you put yourself out there only to get dumped a few days later.
My primary coping method became running. The more I ran, the better I felt. Running is all about seeing how far your body can go, then pushing it to new limits. It’s about improving your image, your health, and yourself. I discovered the perfect running spot, a quiet trail surrounded by trees. Instead of being hung over on Saturday mornings like all the other students, I went out to my running spot. I never partied or drank on weekends–my idea of fun was jamming out to Adele on my iPod while running 4 miles before breakfast.
I’ve heard that rejection is the greatest motivator. Perhaps it takes rejection to fuel to your internal fire and make you work harder. So I want to personally thank coffee-shop guy and all the other “haters”. You have given me exactly what I need to train for my first marathon.